just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
