i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
