So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
