doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
