Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
