He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Your penis caused this!
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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