what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
