When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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