Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Randomize
