My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Acid is not a monday night drug
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
