I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
