I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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