i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
