Dual....:-)
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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