dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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