The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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