Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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