Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
