I hate your face
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
