Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
