All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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