i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I DEMAND FORESKIN
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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