god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
