Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
