Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
