his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
