margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
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