He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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