You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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