office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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