Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
