walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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