Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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