We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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