My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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