I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
