'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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