You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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