Your face is a jimmy john
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
