i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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