Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
