If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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