did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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