I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
