YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
