i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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