i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
