I hate your face
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
