it was like his penis was on wheels.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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