there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
