no. you can't hotbox the world.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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