i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
